This is an essay by Jack Handey and I thought it was funny.Thank you for stopping. You have obviously found me unconscious by the side of the road or at a party, or possibly propped up against a wall somewhere, and you have wisely reached into my pocket and found this medical advisory.If you found ot

LOS ANGELES - The Bush administration appears poised to push through a change in U.S. Forest Service agreements that would make it far easier for mountain forests to be converted to housing subdivisions.

Biggest hits, in order of pageviews, from 2008. Note that these are individual stories, not totals from ongoing coverage. So several show up multiple times in multiple forms: - Three KFC employees in hot water after dip in restaurant's sink (mobile version): 189,949 pageviews -

Sen. Dianne Feinstein takes to the pages of the Chronicle today to lambaste the Bush administration for changing the rules to allow concealed weapons in national parks -- at least by citizens who hold permits in states where the firearms...

My what a difference a month makes in politics. Seems like it was just yesterday that we were losing in Iraq, gas prices were off the charts, both Hillary and Barack were raking in millions in illegal campaign contributions and ACORN was working out of Obama’s back pocket to fix an election, by paying for votes from peop

I was doing fine until I saw the rocking chairs. My attacks of Bush-bashing were in remission. I told myself it was time to move on, to embrace the change you can believe in and, well, you get the idea.

NEW RULE: After viewing the shoe throwing incident during President Bush's speech, I wonder if U.S. security will now use an old Japanese tradition, and have everyone leave their shoes at the door, ya think?

Easy money led to asset bubbles in real estate and equities in Japan in the late 80s and early 90s. The inevitable collapse led to a severe recession. Then the government stepped in a la Bush-Obama. Result? Overall during the...

A GM failure would cause production problems, crush already weak demand and potentially open the door to low-cost competitors. By Chris Isidore, CNNMoney.com senior writer Last Updated: December 15, 2008 NEW YORK (CNNMoney.com) — Detroit’s Big Three aren’t the only automotiv

No musical gathering would be complete without a jam rendition of Old Crow’s “Wagon Wheel.” Rock me… (And bonus points — but no tossed shoes ’cause I like my heels — if you can spot Gillian Welch in the vid below.) -Christy Posted in conversation, Music, TV   Tagged

BAGHDAD - On a whirlwind trip shrouded in secrecy and marred by dissent, President George W. Bush on Sunday hailed progress in the wars that define his presidency and got a size-10 reminder of his unpopularity when a man hurled two shoes at him during a news conference in Iraq.

The 2008 election took the West another big step down the path of political realignment that has been under way since the turn of the century. By 2000, the Rocky Mountain West had become essentially a one-party region. All eight of its governors were Republicans, as were 13 of its 16 senators. In the 2000 electi

According to the Constitution, the president has the power to issue pardons or commute the prison sentences on any criminal conviction. This pardon, regardless of justification, cannot be overruled. Every pardon should either right a judicial wrong or show mercy where mercy is due. However, history clearly shows

A wise friend Kelly suggested I wait to write about son Joe and his wife, Marie̵

A presidential proclamation designating the Tulelake Relocation and Segregation Center near Newell in Siskiyou County as part of a World War II Valor in the Pacific National Monument was signed Friday by President George W. Bush.

As he prepares to move back to Texas, our 43rd president is the beneficiary of Bush fatigue. The nation has long since repudiated him. Americans are looking ahead to the promise of Barack Obama.

A small old ceramic bowl filled with little offerings sits on my desk. It reminds me of a monk’s alms bowl, but instead of being filled with food or money, my bowl is full of gifts from many of the people whose gardens I visited or who shared their gardening stories on In a North State Garden this year

Last Monday, my wife and I were doing our duty as Adopt-A-Park volunteers when I noticed a long 15′ continuous line of ashes in the bushes along the Mary Lake walking path. I thought this was an odd place for someone to dump their BBQ or fireplace ashes. Then a go

CHICAGO (AP) -- President-elect Barack Obama picked a national security team headed by former campaign rival Hillary Rodham Clinton and Bush administration holdover Robert Gates on Monday, and said he wants to consult with military commanders before settling on a firm timetable to withdraw U.S. combat troops fro

Time for some basic math. We have about 300 million people in this country. There are 535 members of Congress, plus the President and a few hundred highly educated bank and insurance company CEO’s, who are supposed to know what they are doing. But strangely over the past few months, we have dove another $7 trillion in

WASHINGTON - Under President Bush, California Democrats often felt like actor Rodney Dangerfield - disrespected.But with President-elect Barack Obama headed to the White House - giving their party control of both ends of Pennsylvania Avenue for the first time in 14 years - lawmakers from California, one of the n

It may upset some of the Democratic Party’s more amped up liberals who want us out of Iraq now, but Barack Obama did the wise thing in asking the Bush administration’s defense secretary, Robert Gates, to stay on in that post

For the past 10 years or so, all agents that work at Real Estate Professionals GMAC have directed a portion of every sale commission to The Community Fund. Tens of thousands of dollars hav

I'm pretty sure the Wall St. Journal's editorial writer is attempting to praise President Bush or his staff here, but I just can't tell for certain. Can anyone tell what this means? Amid the brief market euphoria, it is hard...

Half naked man arrested in horse pastureUpdated 11:47 a.m., November 19, 2008 RED BLUFF — Tehama County sheriff’s deputies arrested an Orland man Tuesday night after a rancher reported seeing him in his horse pasture wearing only a flannel shirt and an electronic monitoring dev

  President-elect Barack Obama cannot appoint Sen. Hillary Clinton as his secretary of state. Frankly, I think Sen. Clinton would do a good job. But her husband, President Bill Clinton, is too mu

This is how mistakes happen, kids.Lose focus for just a moment and you're left with $30 out-of-pocket to your hairdresser - who decided to take pity and get you in on a late Saturday afternoon when you've got dinner plans - for mistakes you made for trying to be goodly groomed.It's been a long week of work

The Bush administration today announced a non-binding agreement with PacifiCorp that details how the utility can turn over control of four Klamath River hydroelectric dams so they can be removed to help struggling salmon.

Iraq is a problem without a solution, and the blame for the coming foreign relations disaster belongs entirely to President Bush. The only way to avoid the coming bloodshed is to never have invaded Iraq in the fist place.   Even John McCain's prescription of remaining in Iraq 100 years would not avoi

WASHINGTON — All smiles and compliments, President-elect Obama and his wife, Michelle, called on President Bush and first lady Laura Bush Monday in a White House visit that was part political ritual, part practical introduction and a striking symbol of the historic transfer of power to come.

It's been a dismal eight years for the U.S. Forest Service. When the Bush administration took office, it immediately suspended a popular measure to protect 58 million acres of backcountry public forests from new roads. Instead, the agency became consumed by firefighting.

ow. Wednesday was a record historical postelection down day on Wall Street. I guess that "redistribution of wealth" thing is getting a head start. Of course this has nothing to do with Barack Obama; in fact, I think it’s George Bush’s fault.

During the final presidential debate, Bob Schieffer asked both McCain and Obama which of their campaign promises (cut taxes, invest in renewable energy research, institute universal health care, etc.) they would have to delay

Now I can breathe a sigh of relief and feel once again that maybe most Americans don’t suffer from low I.Q. Despite my desire to believe most of us are rational, kind hearted people, eight years of Bush darkened my view of the citizenry. But the looks on people’s faces last night, every color and creed of [...]

I've got a serious CNN/Saturday Night Live Presidential Ba

Inman News reported today that the Bush administration would like to allocate $500 billion for a loan guarantee program that could provide lenders incentive to modify up to 3 million at risk loans

Your editorial (Saturday) endorsing Wally Herger for another term as U.S. congressman I find to be reprehensible. He has been a lackey serving President George W. Bush, and has supported his policies 100 percent since Bush was first voted into office. Congressman Herger attempts to pass himself off as a rancher

Why I Can't Vote For Obama By Huntley Brown Dear Friends, A few months ago I was asked for my perspective on Obama, I sent out an email with a few points. With the election jus

Today on Meet the Press, General Colin Powell endorsed Barack Obama for president. While this endorsement does not close off all arguments against Barack Obama, it should be sufficient to put a stop to the fringe argumen

So we’ve been on a spin cycle with Joe The Plumber, who — you betcha — already has a Wikipedia entry. But this morning Colin Powell, former Secretary of State to President Bush 2.0, summed up in seven minutes what’s been eating at me for months as the election season — more than any other [...]

The top ten things that would happen if we elect a pro-choice president On November 4th:1. Roe v. Wade would exist for at least another 30 to 40 years by the US Supreme Court appointments he m

Frank Caliendo I try not to toss the “B” word around too liberally, but in the case of Frank Caliendo

Just heard an interview with the chairman of an indie bank here in Palm Desert. He said some nervous customers have taken to storing cash in their safe deposit boxes. Now that's a vote of confidence in the Bush-Paulson-Reid-Pelosi bailout....

The year was 1960. I was in my first year in college. The presidential election was fewer than 30 days away. The reaction was: “Why can’t we just vote no?” The debates had gone on and were still to come. The attacks and counterattacks on television and in the newspapers and the radi

I've always been ambivalent as to whether a newspaper needs to "endorse" a Presidential candidate. I can make up my mind, thank you very much.However, the way Silas Lyons backed out of endorsing a Presidenti

Our story so far: Aug. 10: Something stinks at Haven Humane

Has the world lost its mind? Democrats took over Congress two years ago with promises to lower energy prices with some “common sense measures.” Well, with the financial world in a meltdown, oil is now below $80 a barrel. However, I’m not so sure that causing Wall Street to lose 40% of its value over the last year and

WASHINGTON - President Bush and the world's financial leaders staged repeated displays of unity Saturday to combat an unfolding credit crisis, hoping to calm investors whose panic has spread despite bold and accelerating government action.

Second in a series Nov. 20, 2005: Leo Wayne Tokarz Rapp, 20, was found dead in the trunk of a car that was leaving town but took a wrong turn and landed in a ditch. He was dead — stabbed in the throat, wrapped in a tarp and suffocated. Victoria Rose Sherman, 18, and five other young peopl

I used to buy Erica Jong's books and read them devoutly under the misguided notion that she had something vital to say to women about men. Then one day I wised up and realized she just has an obsession with penises and wants to tell everyone about it.But I took a gander at her column in the Huffington Post and t